Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
