nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Randomize
