chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
