break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
