I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
