Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
