I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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