well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize