I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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