me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
