i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I love you.
Bad choice
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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