pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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