What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize