I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
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