I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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