If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
