It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
