The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
