It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
