I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
