Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
BRING THE BAGELS
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
