i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
