what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Randomize
