i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize