Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
