Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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