remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize