god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
