Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize
