Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
this just has baby written all over it
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Randomize
