My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
