there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
