WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Randomize
