You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I touched a dick in church today
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Randomize
