is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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