Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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