its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Two words: blizzard sex
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I'm always down for nudity.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
