come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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