Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
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