is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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