I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
