You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize