just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
