you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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