Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize