can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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