Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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