UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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