Everything about him screamed your future.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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