Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
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