You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Randomize
